Tuesday, November 04, 2008

when goin gets tough ....


Today I was feeling a bit gloomy since evening . ..No particular reason,(screwed my sapm test ..naah tat wasnt probably the ryt one behind )..probably just one of those days where you just don't feel good about yourself...Anyways, life doesn't really give u a choice so I went around my busy day doing things putting my mood on a backburner.Went to c'not , had a cup of coffee,ate maggie ,discussed a few issues , did some room cleanin ....A friend called, I asked him to call later, in no mood to talk apparently....went to dinner and then decided to watch the movie "Fashion" with my friend ...this movie I heard was a one time watch but still everybody has been watching it around recently so thought of givin it a shot ...Now my friend called back and was in a mood for a philosophical discussion we talked about the movie and now finally here I am blogging with the background muzik " marjaawan ...the fashp track" from the movie .

Well , cumin to the summarized discussion we had when both of us are on the verge of entering the new world, the proffesional world pretty soon , for me its gonna be january when my practice school statrts ....Well the movie in one line says ,"character is something you build through-out life and strength is something you acquire from within while building character". This realization has become more and more relevant and obvious to me as i recall certain things in my life n that of others . Its the tough decisions one needs to make in life that take a lot of personal strength and conviction. A situation would not be tough I guess if it did not demand an extraordinary amount of thinking, decision making and then sticking with it against all odds and literally the whole world! But doing just that is what makes you a stronger person... ryt
In professional life this would be almost a routine scenario - something important comes up and viola most people start worrying. Perhaps,The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work....With the work of course comes your strategic reasoning, ability to rationalize, personal vested interest and a whole lot of politics .....But this is also where the hammer meets the hot iron if you will. You feel cornered to take the path of least resistance, or the past of highest long-term or short-term personal benefit forgetting about almost everything and everyone else like the movie ! The mark of a true leader (at least one I would look up to) is who
comes up with the answer to what is the right thing to do in his interests not forgetting others around !!! Executives who come up with popular decisions are a dime a dozen, who cares about them! Yes they will make a lot of money but they will also lose friends, loyalists, respect and their own selves as they continue to grow in the very rampant corporate model.

A really passionate proffesional should be able to make tough decisions without screwing someone. The first time you make a decision that works for everyone but screws up one person in your team; you are doomed you are going down the wrong path and every decision after that you will find it easier to screw others in making the most for yourself. So keep it human! y not be rational, reasonable, sensitive and less selfish if not selfless! and if u continue in the lead u definitely would be confronted with the ....."Boy I should have resisted my urge!"

Another thing which movie hints to is that "Often expectation fails, and most often where most it promises; and often it hits where hope is coldest; and despair most sits."Generally speaking we are all told not to expect. Not having expectations or lowering them certainly makes it easier to be content and happy but is that
really practical? Not expecting anything in return for acts like passing on your notes or accompanyin your friend when hez alone is plausible. However, not having any expectations from people that I love or cherish is something totally impossible for me . Though there are a very few on that list as is the case with everyone .Of course we all have heard that true love is unconditional. On a high level, our parents do love us throughout life unconditionally (luv ya ma papa)but even the best parents do have expectations. I think it comes naturally to our race to expect. The measure of expectations might vary from little to great .Hmm , now I have to go figure out yet the answer to my question: To expect or not to expect? .......
"soche dil ke aisa kash ho
jaise khwaab hai aankhon mein base meri
waise neendo pe silvate pade meri......."
with this note time to come back from never neverland of thoughts .....

About the movie , yeah u can watch it once if u have 2 -3 hours to while away ...

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Memories Remain ....

audiiii ...apogee ...a7 ...anc ...av ...assignments ...

bosm ...bitsmail ...bitching ... bday bash

c'not ...cycle-rush ...choms ...crushes ...confessions ...clubs n department ...csa ...cdc's ...clock tower ...compre's ...ceeri

dc ...

electives ...ec ...epc ...extra classes ...enthu

fundoo ...f2005186 ...fd's ...founder's day ...farewell's

gen ...ghotting ...gossipin ...grubs ...gults ...garovista ...god-level ...gtalk

.....

ic ...ipmsgr ...ipc ...insti ...informalz ...idpop ...idson ...illads ...ipc vale bhaiya :P

jaipur to pilani

krap ....

lite .... laccha sessions ...library ghotting ...ltc

mt .... multicasts ...mess ...masala papad ...mnb ...meera bhawan ...music nites .... maggie mallu..

nite-outs ...notes ...newsletters ...nescafe ...net

ob ...oasis ...onlines

pahadi ...pr ...ps ...profs ...prithvi ...pogo ...placements ...psentisem ...plcc

qt...

reddi ...raf ...rickshaw

shivg ...shit man ...sac ...sky ...sitcoms ...sam chaat ....sleepin in lectures ...snap sessions

timetable ...tadi ...telnet ...temple ...tuts n tests ...treats ...tp

ulti ...

vetty ...

wingies ...walks to remember ...workshop

xerox...

zuk ...



a flash of words which rushed through my mind when i flipped through my bitsian dictionary .....

Friday, October 17, 2008

Why do we ...


Why do we constantly keep telling ourselves not to be judgmental. Would it be easier to just convince ourselves that we are indeed judgmental hypocrites and that there's nothing we can do about it?

Why do we ignore the people who don't care about us, because we know there are people who care .....

Why do we waste our time on those who don't waste theirs on us .....

Why are we always right and everyone else is always wrong. But once in a while, we wake up in the middle of the night and go, "Oh crap. What if this time I am wrong?"(like i did yesterday , having a sleepless night )

Why do force ourselves to bitch to fit in... what if we have nothing to bitch about?

Why do we freak out if something is too good to be true. But what if it is indeed true....

Why are we often stopped by a sudden instinct just when we're about to say something. If we still say it, we're screwed. If we don't say it, we are still screwed.

Why do we all reach a point in our life where we go "What the heck?". But not many of us do something about it.

Why do we say we're fine in our comfort zone. But if the comfort zone is so comfortable, why are we so restless?

Why are we always in search for something better , what if we already have the best ...
Why don't we quit when we should.


We think too much about the things listed above. But sometimes we don't think enough

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Something Cooking :P


Recently we had silent moments together .... it was just me n him together all alone
and it was getting all difficult for me to resist the temptation .At first glance itself he took my breath away .Honestly ... awesome, decadent, indulgent, amazing!!!!
Oh my god hold your imagination and stop cooking stories .It was me with my cake in the mess .I was really elated for it turned out so well ,ehh am a gud cook .I was baking this cake in the mess for my friend's birthday and it was then i started wondering about food , what better can u think of in mess :P


Food ummm is

...an everyday routine.

...the necessity of life.

...a good riddance (nice escape to say goodbye- hey gotto go for lunch/dinner )

...the only thing I look forward to on certain days.

...an annoying interruption in the middle of a busy day.

...comes as a respite in the middle of a busy day.

...an ice-breaker.

...full of variety .

...an avenue to be yourself.

...a great avenue for bonding and knowing .

...makes you wonder.

...adds to you identity.(oh this dish is ms x's fav , oh she cooks this dish wonderfully)

...a source to fetch u praises. (provided u r a good cook )

...a tool to avoid awkward silences..

...a nuisance when you have no one to have it with.

...at times expensive and totally not worth it.

...a factor that contributes greatly to the "It's lonely at the top" concept.

...a great way to get creative .

...a great source of delight, especially when u succeed in cooking .

...adds flavor to life .

...yuck.

...yummy.

...yummiest when ma makes it.

PS : Soon will u get to see d cake.....

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

An inconvenient truth

once-in-a-lifetime opportunity knocked at my door .....

a dream so vivid , infact a prophetic dream .....

skewed perception

staisfaction

contentment leading me away from perfection ......

perfect time does not exist .....

involuntary submission of my mind to satisfying pleasures of job i had deceiving me from the universal truth that -" it's Google, the Angelina Jolie of tech employers"


I wrote the aptitude test in a very disinterested manner and was busy yesterday night watching movies :D , slept at 3:30 am n got a call at 8 saying u have interview within 15 minutes so rush .......

Had the interview and after the interview I felt horrible. I knew I wasn't going to get an offer. Churning in my mind was what went wrong?. Somewhere deep down i knew and the feeling of dejection was sinking in . I suspect that the guy had a negative inclination about me the moment the interview started. It's just pure speculation. I have no way of knowing........

Donno why but all of a sudden i recalled Shawshank Redemption - Hope is a good thing, may be the best of the things. And no good thing ever dies ...when i was called upon for the second round of interview ....

About the interviews i realized that they do not care about who you are and what you are good at. They care about who they are and how good you are in what they do. They probably do not even try hard to figure out how easily/rapidly you could evolve to the particular skillset they are looking for. At least, this is what I have learnt from interviewing with them.
I have heard how wonderful it is to work at Google, but also how hard it is to get in.Maybe I truly don't have the brain power Google is looking for. Maybe I truly am NOT a good fit for what Google is looking for.
An Inconvenient truth but then we all take chances...and if every chance we took guaranteed success....well, that would just spoil the fun of taking a chance.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Wanna Commit ?

First of all disclaimers : This post is written just for fun and is not there to hurt anyone's sensitivites. Neither does it says anything about my current status - Commited/ Single and ready to mingle/ single but not interested. So please do not make any assumptions n deductions. Just total tp.... considering its just 12:30 am and its a bit too early to sleep ...... so just writing all crap which is going around in my mind.

A weird kinda ambience is all around ....people saying kash meri bhi gf hoti , tips dede to get a gf ....ya bf hota toh kaisa hota .... Most of the friends have been talking of similar stuff- 'the kind of partner they want'.... Donno all of a sudden why everybody is luking for a partner... i was a bit confused about this new trend..... thought it was a long time since 'i love u' virus striked....... but after some brain( yeah i bet tht i hv one) storming i realised that its psenti sem n so people looking for a psenti :P
First let me start with my hostel- a home away from home. Coming to the point, there are 24 people on my floor, consisting both psenti-semites n nonpsentisemiites. n around 10-12 of them have that 'special' friend, or at least pretend to have one...:). so i decided to ponder upon d lifestyle of these 'experienced' people n analyse the pros n cons of having a girlfriend/boyfriend. This wud give me an idea whether i need a boyfriend now or should i wait for sum more time

coming to the pros of being committed-

- u get someone with whom u can talk. yeah if he is not from Bits Pilani this is probably the only way u can remain in touch with him. This place provides u with such varied kind of experiences tht u always would like to share. There are moments when u need someone someone to talk to..... sometimes when u screw up the tests or tuts or quizzes( that does happen a lot), lots of night outs when u wud love to call him in morning at 6am before catching up the 2 hr sleep before the class, talking about the crap which some of the profs throw at us , may be treats or lacha sessions we have, n those different kinda experiences which any girl would have experienced in a Girl's hostel ... n its not only about sharing ur experiences..... u also come to know whats going on in the world outside the campus.... n if he is from Jaipur, i cud get all the news regarding the events going on in 'aapno' Jaipur. i do have my set of close friends with whom i share most of my stuff, but sometimes i have to think twice before calling them up- reasons being they being busy during the day at there college , its my psenti sem not theirs( though 3 years stint at college have taught me that some of them can only be busy during the canteen session.) .... at those moments u like to have a friend whom u can ping n disturb at any moment n who would be ready to listen to all crap n arbit chattel u r going to throw at him.

- one of my friend's boyfriend sends lots of chocolates and cakes every 15 days-now this is a real big advantage as well as incentive of having a boyfriend. Imagine someone sending u a lot of gud stuff to eat after every few days..... u get a chance to forget the crap u r forced to eat in the mess.... this is a real big big advantage i m looking forward to :P

- the personality changes n esp when it comes to guys they become a bit more responsible person, at least try to become one .Real lazy n laid-back kind of guys.... those who don't like to take bath before 2 days n don't shave regularly.... start feeling obliged when someone cares for them...so when she asks whether they had dinner properly, it wud be difficult to lie n say that the food was gud. difficult not to execute the 'room-cleaning operation' which have been pending for a couple of months usually.... a person starts to become mature in the way he talks, he dresses, he carries himself n all other similar stuff.

One of my floormate's boyfriend acts as a morning alarm for her.... yeah he religiously calls her up every morning half an hour before the class waking her up n motivating her to go to class.... another incentive for me as i have started to miss classes more regularly.... not a bad way to be woken up..... better to have someone's mellifluous voice acting as a morning alarm than to hear that cacophonous alarm of that alarm clock which i want to crush everyday while getting up.

Den yeah your acads rock once u get committed , u r not far from making a 10 :D

coming to the cons, i can see a long list of them too

- first of all the inflated phone bills... most of these guys get a phone bill of around 4K per month... a huge amount.... i may be offered 'premium membership' by airtel guys, but who'll pay the bills ..... and if at all my dad gets to know all this he wud say "beta pack ur bags and come back home , marriage would be a cheaper alternative :P"

- then all those rona-dhona n getting senti- now i m a fun loving n chillax kinda gal who gets well with everybody.... a bit emotional sometimes but certainly not that kinda person who can 'bear' with all those 'mushy-mushy' tantrums all the time....being very frank about it.. n wud be really difficult for me to say -'u r really intelligent' when he takes a stupid decision or for that matter praise his latest crazy t-shirt ....

- time , there is one thing that is really at premium at BITS n that is time.... whenever u get some free time, it is probably better to have a nap than talking endlessly with someone on the other end. if i m going talk to him for an hour everyday, he may say 'BITS ki seat kyun kharab kar rahi ho, useless gurl just spending time on phone' n if i did not talk for that one hour specified limit then he wud say ' what careless gurl i have choosen... moron cant find sometime for me ...alas.... bhaav kha rahi hai'

Variable costs go up - gifting stuff, chocolates, dresses- a big headache for guys ngals i guess. N then wishing on a number of days is really painful. Last semester one of my wingies had a fight with her boyfriend over phone. the reason came out was that the guy had forgotten her to wish 'Happy Rose Day'.... now i really felt pity for that guy... he had 2 painful assignments to submit the next day... he did not remember whether he had his dinner, so how was he expected to remember the Rose Day.... n then more n more new concepts r flooding the market apart from the traditional ones - Valentine's Day, Friendship day... the days r not really far off when we wud be having 'Father -In-Law Day' n 'Pet-in-law' days.... donno what will happen then.

i m really confused now... kahtein hain - 'this is kinda ladoo.... jo naa khaaye woh lalchayee n jo kha le woh pachtayee' :p. but its really fun for us when we observe n tease those guys regarding their relationships :)

Friday, September 12, 2008

Perfect timepass !!

me :Hey m bored ....do something
He :okies sawal hamare jawaab aapke khelte hein
me : kya ?
He : arre seedhi sadhi bhasha mein bole toh tag :D
me :hmm k shoot n no boring questions plz :P
He : arre sab kuch tumhare answers pe hai yahan ;)
me :waah ! k chalo

1. What is your current desktop picture ?

Ab desktop pictures mein aap kya dekhenge - sunsets , palaces , gardens , monuments , waterfalls etc etc . Waise right now I see my dad smiling at me on the desktop . Hi Papa .

2. Do you believe in gay marriage ?

Huh ? Oye gay marriage hain , koi UFO thode hi hain jo pooch rahe ho "Do you believe ?". I believe a marriage is a union of two minds , who then commit to tread the path of life together , facing all adversity and celebrating all joys together , and helping each other grow in the process . Gay or otherwise , the essence of a marriage is unaffected by such trivial issues . Subhan allah , ekdum miss world waala answer diya na :P

3. What do you want more than anything right now ?

Watch Gone with the wind....Novel bahut badi hai n aajkal badhti hui umra k saath patience n nazrein kam hoti ja rahin hain :P

4 . What time were you born ?

On a mildly cool night that fateful day in February, I was delivered into this world , with no indication of the fact that I was to grow up to become the wonderful and charming young woman I am today . Within seconds of my being born , a pretty nurse with big eyes wrapped me into a soft white blanket . As she was turning back to get something else , I suddenly gripped her finger with my tiny palm , pulled her towards me and squeaked in my newly discovered voice - "Aunty , time kya hua hain ?."

You actually think all this happened ? Nahin na . So how am I expected to know what time it was when I was born ?

5. Are your parents still together ?

Oye ! Mr America , humare India mein parents remain together . They are very much together and have no dangerous plans . Shaadi mein fevicol khaayi thi ma papa ne , mazboot jod hain , tootega nahi.

6. Last person who made you cry ?

Me . I believe no one else can make me cry . Tears arise out of what I do with the thoughts in my head . ( Kaafi profound hain yeh jawaab , samajh na aaye toh koi nahin )

7. What is your favorite perfume/deo ?

Yaar main koi Page 3-socialite-fashion designer types hoon jo itna perfume conscious hongi ? Apna chal jata hai eva se .Vaise evening in paris sounds nice bolne mein ...

8. What kind of hair/eye color do you like in the opposite sex ?

Am a very adjusting and easy going person toh chalega kuch bhi , its jus it wud be totally uncool to have someone without one :P

9. What are you listening to ?

the wing's gossip with the background music -dil chahta hai


10. Do you like pain killers ?

Like ? What's there to like or dislike in a pain killer ? If there is pain , I take the pill . You don't expect me to 'like' pain killers and yell "Maaaa ! Aaaj lunch mein aloo ke paranthe aur pain killers bana do ! Bahut din ho gaye accha khaana khaye hue !."

11. Are you too shy to ask someone out ?

Nahin Nahin n esp jab m bored n want a company . Aata kya Gone with the wind dekhne ? Ab bolna toh "aata kya khandaala' chahti thi , but abhi khandaala jaane ka mood nahin hai yaar.

12 . If you could eat anything right now , what would it be ?

The guy who's asking so many questions in this tag . With some tomato ketchup.

13. Who was the last person you made mad ?

Ma. I do that with alarming frequency.

14. Is anyone in love with you ?

Gentleman , this question is for you. Aaju baaju mat dekh , baat dil ki bol daal.

Friday, September 05, 2008

May be i'm jus confused !!

I’m too bored. It’s not that I don’t have anything to do. It’s just that I seem to have no interest in doing anything. These days, I can’t do one thing for any period of time longer than 15 minutes.I start flipping through the pages of the newspaper and then throw it away ,so that I can google something , give up again . I turn on a movie and then pause it, so that I can read somebody’s blog for sometime. Then, I stop doing that so that I can chat with a friend. Then i fumble through some pages of Shantaram (currently reading ) and , I suddenly feel like blogging myself. I keep arguing with myself on whether or not it makes sense to post something for the whole world to see and whether or not it is any good, until I give up and unpause the movie only to restart the whole cycle after a while.I guess i need to consult Dr Greg house ;) .I alternately feel lonely and crowded (can you suggest another word?). Sometimes I wonder if I’m supposed to be somewhere else, like in a different universe. Sometimes I wonder what race it is, that I’m running. Why I’m in it. What I’m running away from and running towards. Maybe, this is what they call existential angst. Maybe, I just need to call up someone . Will go do that now. Blogging really helps :D

Thursday, August 28, 2008

~ToPsY TuRvY ~ TizZy TazZy Journey

So how was the whole journey is d question which comes my way almost everyday , well i think it's been one of d interesting journeys i have fared through which had almost every element of life wrapped in .
17th August , people wished loads of luck :) for d new start ahead

18th August ,D day came , Deshaw D Dream company of many (mine was always oracle , u know how much i believe in realistic n achievable targets :D ) , Prezo began n we were introduced to d team , n i was jus telling my frn nearby , he seems so strict he can screw in interview , he has assuring luks n blah blah as if i was goin to get shortlisted .Presentation was over n den came d time for d aptitude test the first stop of d long journey ,It went, as I recall, very cordially, but it was clear to me that I was out of my league, I splooshed d quant section , computer skills went k , program was easy i guess everybody solved dat question ryt , yeah i was very satisfied wid d essay writing :D .As i was walkin out of d examination hall , i was lost thinking over n over about d quant section , man i jus attempted some 60-70% ......
Mom called jus then n i told her mom i spoiled it all,things did not go as I
thought they would n she told tat thr r loads of more opportunities to come so cheer up :) and take a cue from what went wrong here. Someone in wing came n said hmm so when r d results cumin , i said its gonna make no difference here so m goin to sleep for i carried no EXPECTATIONS . I was jus abt to hit d bed n thr was a big bang on d door , u r through , congrats congrats congrats ......am i dreamin w/o hitting d bed :O . Some 18 ppl shortlisted and all were just brilliant , donno how i landed in that group .... Called my dad then n told i am really nervous and donno how to go about d interview , he said just be confident and go give ur best .After hanging d fone i realized tat i had another aptitude test to write "Microsoft " , now what , d time was clashin wid my interview , so i called the placement coordiantor n hesaid no need to panic , it 'll be delayed accordingly and was scheduled at some 9:45 .I always wanted a mock interview experience before my dream oracle interview , didnt knew God wud be gracious to give me d first day first show ticket to d interview :P .So i wrote d microsoft test , it was better n cuter than deshaw's so i was happy about it .
It was only an hour later, when I was sitting in my room , that I realized I was feeling a little off and decided, on a whim, to check my pulse, which was 108. Ha ha! I still remember feeling a wee bit overly stimulated. I was a bit exhausted and the time came to get dressed in business casuals ,getting dressed was d best part of d day :P .So i was all set , talked to mom n dad n left .Finally i reached the venue for d inteview ,I had to wait in a side room with the rest of the hopefuls ,nervousness was mounting. I repeatedly asked why I was voluntarily submitting myself to this type of agony... do I get some kind of cheap thrill out of it? I dunno - before I had figured out the answer, I was called in.
Strange but as i was walkin in there was a magic spell and i very confidently walked in , greeted the panel n introduced myself .It started with the normal hr stuff , about u , y shud we hire u , plans for ms n y deshaw ( but obv ans cool pay n job-profile ;) ) I rattled on and on and on and on and on about just about everything they asked ds , loads of c stuff , dbs n yeah plcc too where i was a bit struck but still blabbered a wrong answer without any sign of hesitation , u know this is what confidence is all about :P. I was entirely focussed, answering each question with a minimum of pauses and a maximum of information. Finally after many questions, some predictable and some not, I was shown out at 12:15 am aah a relif. My rather slim file of certificates wasn't even glanced at. Shame, I was looking forward to boasting that I had won the dance competition in class 5 :P

The results were to be announced next day afternoon , well i didnt had much of expectation because it is usually accompanied by anticipation and often followed by disappointment. It leaves you with a ‘what now’ taste in your mouth. Sometimes expectations are the result of how we want the world and people to be our little girl/boy inner child fantasy.
Now came the results and the deserving 5 got d offer n i accepted my first rejection in a very sporting manner , sometimes we have played out the scenario in our heads,we already know the outcome and start planning our acceptance speech. Microsoft results were out n i wasnt shortlisted n at dis point of time there was a bit of sadness in my eyes....It was all ok after a few hours of talkin wid friends n mom-dad n i said "deshaw hmm i 'll make it to deshaw for sure after job hops , i will " hahaha how kiddish of me tat was to help myself find solace:)
In the evening it was amazon , wherein again i did a silly mistake in writing one of d codes i knew well , its just that sometimes timming is wrong or what u call destiny which comes into play ....
Next day it was yahoo n netapp ...... expectations rarely go anywhere without their sidekick assumptions. Wrote d yahoo apti n once again it was me telling ppl " yes m not thru " if this is wat u wanna hear ,we assume we know people how they will react what they will do in given situations and then we walk ahead with a pocketful of expectations based on those assumptions. I don’t think it is realistic to believe you can travel without having an expectation or two. But yeah maybe we can leave the assumptions behind on the next trip and see what develops so i went ahead n attended the presentation of netapp wherein i was thr physically but not mentally for the going was getting difficult.... So finally i wrote d test n getting through this company was absolutely a dream , so this time i didnt expect much , n when in d nite i came to knew i was shortlisted , i recalled d song -breaking the habit's line " i dont want to be the one the battles always choose coz inside i realize ...."Well now this company was to question about networking which gives me cold feet , n i had one nite , i told myself , had enough wanna make these things stop(all rise lyrics :P) , n i had miles to go before i sleep ,God i never studied this amount of compnet ....

The morning came n d interview began at 7:30 , i had a nice start , it started with an algorithm ,I wrote the simplest, naive code that I could think of. I immediately saw some inefficiencies and worked to address them. The guy prodded me slightly to the answer he was looking for (I would have gotten there).He gave me two more coding problems . K done , So neha lets play with linked lists now (God i never did so much coding at a stretch , gimme a break now :P). Thankfully it was 9 n i had to go write d cisco aptitude test n d coding came to halt finally , yaye ...

After cico thingie ,second round began , this time it was with the hiring manage who seemed a bit strict but was nice .We talked for 45 minutes without a hint of coding (a relief). This was a wide-ranging discussion about everything starting from myself , my background (i love talking about myself so i went on n on ) .Then it was time to prove my innovative side so i went about discussing my project ideas ,n we somehow went about discussing the impact of Yahoo, comparison to Google, and finally culture at Netapp. I gained a lot of insight and appreciation for what they’re doing. At one point he started talking salaries and benefits, and I got extremely excited and I had to fight to keep a smile off my face (hey, I don’t want to look like a dork too early). Finally he gave me a chance to ask questions , this is one moment which is yours in an interview :D so in went about asking some stuff n it came to an end

It was time for the 3rd round ,this guy asked a lot about my projects , moulded the situations i took into account , fired me with loads n loads of os stuff n finally came to dbs , asked to write queries , indexing , normalization , blah blah blah ... thank god i was fluent wid dbs and answered his questions satisfactorily . Finally, jokingly, almost reluctantly, he said he may be obligated to give me some coding problem, so let’s do them quickly.
"U like trees ?" we'll code for trees now , again he made me code n code n code . Finally came to some infix expression tree , took me to stacks , queues n finally finally finally told k neha nice meeting u ( oh n it was so not nice meeting u :P )

Between every interview they will talk to each other and they will send e-mails to the other people in the interview loop. Yes, they’re talking about you behind your back. And yes, they will tailor future questions to cover areas missed by previous interviewers, or to follow up on a weakness , wherever u go the network follows ...

Next round was again with the hiring manager , it was a nice chit chat , he enquired about jaipur n about my hobbies n asked me to justify y should netapp hire me , n i was able to impress d manager . if it was only d hiring manager to take d decision i knew offer was in my hands but then there were more rounds to go ...

This time it was networking which went fairly well , as again there was some ds involved (courtesy graphs) which served as my savior n yeah the night-out helped me stand this round and they asked me to attend the net prog classes if possible , I thought i would be told to leave but as i told u their network follows n i was questioned on plcc n aco n finally came my turn again to question . I was just asking about some salary stuff n this guy again stole my opportunity n took over, asking me about bonds n stocks , what's inflation , what's sensex n blah ...hello it was my turn :( .I told him some crap n told i have not been attending the security and portfolio management classes the elective my resume read ...so i m not proficient in this field .

Now it was the finale , i was introduced to the hr guy .He was cool , discussed my school life , college life , asked was i satisfied with the compensation n i told no issues with the salary , its decent .He then told one thing before i give u the opportunity to question , do you drink ? netapp has a culture of booze party every friday .... I told ,I am pretty sure there would be many like me in netapp who dont drink :) n he smiled saying yeah i'll be there to accompany you .Finally making the statement so tired n bored at the end ... told him no it was an interesting interview which stimulated my grey cells n we both smiled in unison :) .Finally i had my question set answered n i took leave .
The whole thing is very hush-hush as nothing can be "official" until the results are known and every moment till the result leaves more n more restless !

My mom's prayers were answered and i got the news that i have been made an offer :) :) :)

yayi i got the job finally ,n this time it was N for Netapp for N for Neha

It is easy to get hung up on expectations or to get defensive,angry and disappointed when they are not met. Expectations at times suck. But in this whole process I learnt to -

"Expect to have expectations".

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Losing track or losing faith?

There are few lines which touch your soul right when you hear them for the first time... Some songs, some comments or even a line of a song... There was a time when i used to love this particular song... "Rhythm Divine" by Enrique (Not that i dont like it now, but the appeal it had has somewhat diminished as the hope is giving way to the submissiveness...). In this song, there is a line where he in the most appealing way, says...

"No one can stop us from having it all..."

And this was the line i loved... Not for the actual meaning it had in the song, but for the hope it gave me for what i had in my mind... in a way, it made me feel as if i was on the right path... Today i listened to the same song for some 2 hrs was lazy enuff to change the song i guess ... And suddenly realised that i was listening it because of it's rhythm and not because of what it meant... And a thought struck me...

"No one can stop us from having it all..." oh yeah, and what all do i want exactly?