a millionaire's first love story

a millionaire's first love story.... i guess i shed a million tears while watching this movie ... a total tear jerker ....A touching story infact a must-watch for fans of Hyun Bin and for those who has enjoyed Mandy's Moore "A Walk to Remember".

LIFO ,FIFOor sequential order !!!!

Isn't it funny how sometimes people expect friendships to follow a sequence?

I think if two people are meant to click as friends, they will. It does not matter how and when they got introduced to each other! It does not matter if they are now closer to each other, than to the common friend through whom they met! I've heard some of my friends complain, oh, I introduced her to so-and-so, and now she hangs out with so-and-so more than she hangs out with me. But time doesn't really have a lot to do with it, does it? Just because you knew the person longer, doesn't mean you can lay claim to being a closer friend?

As easy as it may be for all of us to say 'no' to the above, I guess we've all done it at some point of time. We've all been possessive about our friends at some point of time. But this isn't an accounting entry, or a computer memory, where I can dictate the strength of a friendship through some hard and fast rule or have it increase only in sequential order. The heart doesn't follow rules. The heart does what it pleases. And if your friend now has another 'closer' friend... let go.

Its strange how sometimes two people start on a wrong note, and then go on to become such close friends. Even as I type this, my mind is flooded with instances of people who are now dear to me, but who I disliked like hell on my first encounter. Once again re-iterates my belief, that if two people are supposed to click, they will.

Another strange thing about friendship is that a lot of it is only contextual. Not every good friendship is going to last forever... and we shouldn't try to stretch it. I used to chat for hours with a friend everyday for 2 years, when in school, and now I don't even know where she is. No and it is not because I haven't bothered to keep in touch. Its because some friendships only work well in a particular context. Some friendships are only meant to last a while. And rather than being sorry about it coming to an 'end', I guess we just have to cherish the good times.

The friendships that don't depend on a context... the people who I can relate to no matter how many years since I last spoke to them... the ones who I can talk to for hours regardless of how long I've known them for.... they are the ones who define 'great friends' for me.

Ijazzat.......

Last night i was listening to the tracks of "ijazzat" (i jus love the songs of this movie ).....nd all of a sudden i recieved a call from one of my old friends and he said with a note of surprize if i m not wrong its ijazzats tracks being played in background rite ..... and then started the discussion about the tracks ,the theme n all .......

Ijazzat..... a beautiful, complex and layered film .......

On a rainy night, Mahen unexpectedly runs into his ex-wife Sudha at a railway station waiting room. Two people unwillingly thrown in each other’s company, compelled to revisit a part of their life they have chosen to forget. The relationship has changed, the rules have changed. And the past becomes an intangible third person in the room, much like Maya was in their life. But where is Maya now?

Using his trademark of weaving the past with the present, Gulzar takes us back and forth between the waiting room and their home in the past. (a home, that Mahen remarks, was much like a waiting room.) And the complexities start to unravel. Maya’s free-spiritedness, Sudha’s conflict between being supportive and being possessive, Mahen’s inability to get past his memories but still wanting to keep Sudha happy — the characters become relatable and their dilemmas become real. And as with most of life’s dilemmas, there are no simple answers, no easy solutions.

In a way, Ijaazat is a simple story about three people, two relationships and one night. But it derives its depth from its complex characterizations. Its strength lies in its screenplay and dialogues by Gulzar and its moody cinematography by Ashok Mehta. And in the strong performances of its three leads — Rekha, Naseeruddin Shah and Anuradha Patel.

And of course, in its music. Ijaazat is inarguably one of the finest of Pancham’s oeuvre. Four gorgeous solos, exquisitely crafted by RDB and lovingly sung by Asha with layered poetry by Gulzar that once again show the symbiotic relationship that the three shared. One realizes at such moments, that the whole sometimes is truly greater than the sum of its parts.

Chhotisii kahaanii se, baarishon ke paanii se, saarii vaadii bhar gayii .. sings Asha, as we follow a train’s journey through rain-drenched valleys and mist-covered mountains, while the titles roll. The music is so delightfully visual that one doesn’t need the lyrics to see the scene. The steady rhythm of the train, the sound of the rain slowing down to a drizzle, only to burst into a gleeful downpour once again, a waterfall that cascades grandly or a little brook that plays peek-a-boo .. the images are created by the music, but the on-screen visuals and the lyrics enhance the experience. Gulzar personifies the rain, making it dance lightly, using the clouds as stepping stones —

ruktii hai thhamtii hai, kabhii barastii hai
baadal pe paaon rakh ke, baarish machaltii hai ..

Pancham always claimed to not having an ear for poetry. Seeing the kind of magic he has created with Gulzar’s pen, one wonders if he was just being self-deprecatory. When Sudha sends back some of Maya’s belongings, Maya wants her memories back as well. A song whose lyrics Pancham jokingly described as akin to reading a newspaper. Asha’s voice languidly caresses every word, as she plaintively at times and retrospectively at other times, asks him to return the moments that they’ve shared. Meraa kuchh saamaan tumhaare paas padaa hai ..

meraa kuchh saamaan tumhaare paas padaa hai
saawan ke kuchh bheege bheege din rakhhe hain
aur mere ik khat mein liptii raat padii hai
vo raat bujhaa do
meraa vo saamaan lautaa do ..

ek sau solah chaand kii raatein, ek tumhaare kaandhe kaa til ..

What does that even mean? asked a friend. One hundred sixteen moonlit nights, and one sesame of onion, I replied. Wise friend has promised to never ask us to interpret Gulzar lyrics again. But perhaps it is a count of nights spent together? Or maybe a four month relationship? (One hundred sixteen moonlit nights would be one hundred twenty days minus the four amaavasyas?) White on black and black on white? Contrasts to indicate the gamut of emotions felt? With Gulzar, so many interpretations are possible. But whatever the intended meaning, the imagery is subtly sensual and so very beautiful.

Mahen and Sudha go on their honeymoon, to make a fresh start. Which sets the scene for the next song. Katraa katraa miltii hai, katraa katraa jeene do .. Pancham uses the twin track recording effect beautifully in this number, overlapping Asha’s highs and lows. The locales of Kudremukh form a gorgeous backdrop as Asha’s silken voice hit the high notes of pyaasii hoon main pyaasii rehne do. Her thirst for more is not a complaint. She knows she cannot have Mahen completely, but in her very longing for him, she tries to find happiness.

tumne to aakaash bichaayaa
mere nange pairon mein zameen hai
paake bhii tumhaarii aarzuu ho
shaayad aise zindagii haseen hai
aarzuu mein behne do
pyaasii hoon main pyaasii rehne do ..


But Sudha’s longing remains unfulfilled. Mahen is unable to remove Maya from his life and Sudha is tired of being patient. In these moments of despair, comes the fourth and final song of the movie, a ghazal. Khaalii haath shaam aayii hai, khaalii haath jayegii, aaj bhi na aaya koii, khaalii laut jayegii .. The pain in Asha’s voice is palpable as Sudha sits waiting in the darkness, watching the light come in through the slightly ajar door, a constant reminder that Mahen is not back ..

aaj bhii na aaye aansuu, aaj bhii na bhiige nainaa
aaj bhii ye korii rainaa, korii laut jaayegii ..

Memories are heavy baggage and burying them is the healthy thing to do. But will denying the existence of memories make them go away? Or is it better to embrace them? As Sudha remarks to Mahen, looking at the rain that refuses to stop — baras jaayegii to apne aap thham jayegii. Perhaps memories too are like that. They flood you for a while, but with time, they cease. Then again, memories get their well-deserved burial only at the end of one’s life. As Maya requests Mahen at the end of her letter —

ek ijaazat de do bas, jab isko dafnaauungi
main bhii vahii so jauungii .. main bhii vahii so jauungii ..

Cascade of dreamz.........

When the dream becomes reality? When the surreal meets the real?
This time before time. Where memories flash by, picture by picture. The puzzle comes together to form now. And now is when we go back. In a flash. We are back in time. Frozen once again. But in a different time. A different universe. Spin with me in my eddying emotion. Cruise with me through my youthful fantasy. Flow with me in my surging spontaneity. Swim with me in my divine euphony. Float with me in my phantasmal heaven. Whirl with me in my fragile bubble. Fly with me as I escape
reality..............



I had this dream a couple of nights back ....to b precise b4 os online......
When I walked into this dream for the first time, it didn’t seem like a dream. Everything seemed the way it was supposed to be. Nothing was out of place.....
The clouds, like an outstretched hand, cupping the sky. The light trickling through its fingers. The light of the day above its hand, the light of the night below. Slowly disappearing darkness. It is an indeterminate time of day. Could be morning or evening , it is not clear....Icy winds, tell the coming of the rain. The way the light fell, you could tell it was manipulated. Soft, Glowing, Highlighting. Shining, but not bright enough to make you look away. It drew me in. Softly but surely.......
I`m walking on the sea shores... deeply engrossed in a conversation or rather some kind of arguement about life, success etc etc (me n my dreams lolz ) . Out of the blue I see a wave rising from the sea. . It is just something a bit out of the ordinary, more like a monsoon expression. Except it hardly makes a difference I realise, what you call it. The wave keeps rising and rising - in slow motion - and the name you give it doesn`t matter because all of a sudden I know it is going to crash down on us soon! ( water.....used to be my greatest fear, my reason for not learnin to swim but probably after goa where i decided to kill my fear ..its the lizards which top the list these days )


Strangely I dont feel frightened . Just somewhat reluctant to undergo the possible pain of death by water and read the same in his eyes ....... I just keep still. I wait and so does my friend. Any moment it is going to happen. Still nothing, and I am where I was - waiting. The seconds seem like hours. At some point it is clear to me that the wave has passed and for some strange reason we have not been affected. We are still alive.

Looking at it the next morning I had this sensation that that is what it was. Essence is the thing that remains when all around is being buffetted and everything is undergoing change. Essence is the unchanging part of me whose expression in the world is changing.

And on that wise note I have to retire for my dinner .... my fav aloo ki sabji apparently waiting on the mess table :)

Good Morning !!!!!

Where did stars go when sun rose ?
Where did dreams go we woke up ??
and myriad no. of such questions ,reminds me of era when i used to wake up and had such questions in my mind ....well questions were then out of question n now i wake up with the questions in my mind like
what next for the day ?
where is life leading ??
Am I on right track ???
Are my journeys taking me ahead in right direction ????

In this journey of achieving I still don't know what! We lose our pureness, our plainness.i tried hard but couldn't help becomin manipulative,artificial…pretentious, insecure and what not.Education, understanding and knowledge are the antonyms of innocence and we all thrive for these. but I am sure at some point of time everybody does miss being innocent ..I miss it so much.
the more knowledge we have the less naive we are, the more answers we get the more curious we become!and in this quest of knowledge and understanding we tend to lose what is called 'innocence'.
but do we really have to lose it? even after knowing things can't we be innocent?
I guess - 'No' - this cruel world doesn't allow this.
You have to apply knowledge to function properly else you will end up nowhere

51 facts !!!!!!

Here she' is having her status message saying "drained "...... n i know she really is ...... here i was thinking about this girl ...Never thought she’d last this long…but but but… it is her 50th post!!! Not a big achievement or anything…but still…she thinks its quite the cool.

So as a celebration and given her need for self-indulgence, here are ikyaavan (51) facts about Neha!!!

Main dairy milk chocolate par haath rakh kar kasam khaata hoon, main jo kahoonga sach kahoonga…

1. Name: Neha or nesh :P

2. Birthday:February 23

3. Zodiac:Pisces

4. Sex: Female

5. Blood group : O+

6. Single: As in married or in a relationship?

7. Hometown: Jaipur, India.

8. Currently resides in: Pilani

9. Occupation: When not procrastinating, she deals with the cdc's(compulsary disciplinary courses) of gadget of the generation the computer ...
10. For her, family comes first and she would do anything for them. Irrespective of consequences.

11: School life is fondly remembered for being a topper, playing pranks and talking 19 to the dozens :D. She was really cool at Maths and as usual was the cutie cue . Those were the days….

12: She can read and read for hours…days even. She reads everything from text books (majority of times :P) to philosophy to best sellers, and her favorite book is I guess “The little Prince” and also" The Alchemist "

13: She is allergic to smoking and thus classifies smoking as her turn off

14: Movies for her, are more than a way to pass time. Actually, she wants a career out of critiquing films! Her favorite film since late is “Life is b'ful”.
A pretty hopeless romantic at times , she bawls her heart out while watching bollywood romantic flicks and feels rather silly about it.

15: Neha is kind of fond of music. She has some favourites like Linkin park, U2, Indian Ocean, Strings etc. She is also very fond of soft hindi tracks .

16: While we are at the subject of music, it wouldn’t hurt to mention that she is not very good with lyrics.

17: Also, she has never lost a game of Antakshari, among friends .....Up to it anyone?

18: Her singing belongs to the bathroom but nevertheless, she has a go at it with full enthusiasm anytime, anywhere.

19: She is technologically challenged. She is rather proud of herself for having switched to LINUX finally, but she is still rather suspicious of it…The thought of doing anything new with her system gives her cold feet. She just doesn’t know how.

20: She is a very friendly person and can talk your ear off! And yet, she’s a good listener, they say.

21. She needs her bit of “me” time (who doesn’t?)

22: Neha doesn’t think in black and white. Everything is grey…and it is alright.

23: She believes in miracles. Really.

24:Loves surprises (so me planned of giving her this surprise :) )

26: Coincidences usually brings her a smile .

27:Knows how to bring u a smile too :).

28: She likes sarcasm. Especially when she is the one doling it out to unsuspecting recipients.

29: She once found two awesome soundtracks of the Enigma, and can play them over and over. It still gives her goose bumps.

30: Her favourite season is rains which being in Rajasthan she doesnt njoy much ,however she hates summers and likes winters. Winters give her an opportunity to curl up in bed with a good book, and its one of her ways of switching off.

31: She hates some green vegetables ,loves italian ...and when it comes to dessert gaajar ka halwa n shrikhand being her favourites ..

32: Some of the best time of her life has been spent in Jaipur , where she studied

33: She hates being rude and has a rather high tolerance level for irritating elements. But when she loses it, she loses it in style.

34: She values loyalty the most, and is a very loyal friend, if not an ideal one. When pals are at fault, she stands up for them in public, and thrashes them in private.

35: Her favourite video game is Tetris and she likes to think of herself as a champion of sorts. Her latest obsession is Sudoku, and she is rather good at it ( or so she believes)

36: She loves simple small things the most .

37: She is okay with window shopping, and sometimes has no interest in new clothes. She hates make up and high heels. She, however, likes bags, shoes and perfumes.

38: She is crazy about kids :D and is herself a kid ,pure at heart ,one gal who never hides anything .

39: She is rather fond of travelling and wants to see the world! One of her plans in life include backpacking across Europe.

40: She seldom gets angry, and her anger is like a short storm, that rages and thunders, and then is absolutely quiet.

41: Strange as it is, she survives the bigger blows in life quite easily, it’s the small ones that finish her off…

42: Neha is a happy-go-lucky person , much to the amazement of her friends and foes alike.

43: Even though she has a fairly long list of friends, she is a private person and only few have any idea of her deepest thoughts and feelings. She ends up being a better friend to others.

44: She abhors, and much as she hates to admit, is also scared of lizards and as luck would have it, has had her share of them dropping on/close to her.

45: She is in deep love with Dairy milk .... and the color" blue "

46: Coming to her Mr Perfect .......a guy whoz resourceful,
Acts grown up when she acts childish,assumes control of a problem situation.
doesn’t compare her with other women, realizing that shez she, different in her own ways .he knows when to be serious,can handle her sharp mood swings :P...Loves his family.Respects women ,elders .... Is confident n creative....Fun-loving , who knows how to enjoy life then he knows the art called appreciation,.... Is" well read"Last but not the least ,has good conversational skills .....doesnt she have a too small list of things she luks fwd to :P
forgot 1 thing likes guys in formal wear :P

47: Ok now ppl who turn off are found to have characterstics
Is childish all the time....... Whines and complains...... Always looks up at her for support, without trying to be strong for hims.............Has no ambition
Has little self respect......Is a spendthrift.....Pretends to be " someone " he is "not"... Is overly critical of people in general.......Talks as if hez some 80 years old basically a killjoy

48: She believes in, stands for Human rights, especially Women’s Rights and Feminism.

49: Being a true Piscean, she believes and stands by equality and fairness. . Also she is blessed with other Piscean traits like laziness, hyperactivity at times, indecisiveness, gift of the gab, so on and so forth.

50: Her obsession with Hritik was beyond reason and no matter what anyone says, he was, is and will always be special. When she was in school, she collected picture postcards of him which amounted to some100 and 78. Also, she cries every time she watches him dying on screen. Still.

51: She is a “small town girl” at heart :) though being from JEYPORE as she calls it at times

Always be the way you are !Hope she accepts my comment

Ankur

Tip tip barsaa paani :D

The clouds gather in the corner of the blue sky making it dark and as if to say something which they wanted to say something forever. You expect something to happen , may be you expect the storm to blow.... May be , there is a time for everything in the order of things. When you chance upon the sudden realization , something comes to your mind , that enigma track called “return to innocence”, don’t know why but it comes to your mind.
Well, when you were thinking so much of chained thoughts , it begins to rain:DD Rains in pilani yes! yes! yes! ....The clock refuses to accept the weather. It looks as if it is evening , the clock argues with it by proclaiming it is nowhere near the onset of evening , it loudly says time is stuck in point near the afternoon. May be this is how the perplexing thoughts hit you . Well , as it rains outside , I look on and the wind tries to force a battle with the paper (ot assignment )in which I am writing.The raindrops carry on taking their flight from the clouds to the ground. The leaves take a few drops to look greener and greener . The passion of the green leaves is so simple.

Enough now ,i lost the battle of my paper being swayed by wind (luvd losing this one ) n yippie me out in rains with frns ....once again back to innocence the splashing of water ,the paper boats,the rain dance ,those singing aloud ,that running n shiverin ...getting drenched to my soul aah lovely ....... i luv rains i luv rains i luv rains ..

n here is someone playin the song i walk a lonely road n this brings to my mind some of the memories of the not so long ago days ...Jeans rolled up, balancing the bag and the umbrella…...Goa yes ....lolzz those were the days !!!
walking a bit more backward reminds me that there are just too many things I associate with the rains..... have already mentioned abt them in 1 of my posts but neva mind here i go again ......
That smell of the earth after the first rains of the season

The small paper boats we used to float in puddles…

Long walk with friends on the wet roads at night…

Coffeeeeeeeeeeeee :) :)

Splashing water on each other

Catching a cold....wet hair

A big fight with a loved one...

Some songs....

Profound wisdom......


Huddling under an umbrella with a want to get wet wet wet n finally throwin it away...
(god i still remember the watchman's reaction n lecture when i got wet wet wet in goa lolzzzz)

Colourful raincoats and cute children carrying bags beneath them........

kissing the raindrop...

Its just so amazing ..... remembering the tit -bits that rains leave me wid .....
But time moves on , nostalgia is always like this , tickles your heart so that you refuse to budge. Stints in life teach you the best days are days which are very simple in nature. Cliché’s are easy to find I guess but to be simple is a bit difficult.

The skies along with me await the onset of the festivities. The bful skies which I look forward to and the glowing nights. May be the time comes when every year you meet a new hope and new urge to live on. Eagerness in my heart leads to the chain of thoughts that move on into the life. The chain of my thoughts in very clear , I don’t want to look at a blank paper, it looks much better when it is filled up so me finishing my assignment :D
There’s something to look forward to , here goes the wind again.....
Love u weather for bringin me a big smile :)
neha

Why do we ......

Indian ethnicity, especially Hinduism, is very profound and deep-rooted. It is admired and respected all over the world. Our culture is full of small and sweet traditions, which are quite simple but which carry a divine message in them. Most of the rites and sacraments have some or the other strong wisdom at its foundation. These rituals can be explained in simple terms, but at the same time, if they are followed blindly, without the understanding of the factual basis, they could lead to doubts and blind faith, which casts a shadow on the tradition.

One of the most remarkable characteristic of our great heritage is the paradigm of re-enacting itself according to the reformation of the society. Hundreds of examples exist as a proof, and also is the eradication of many of the discriminating ceremonies like 'satipratha' and 'untouchablitiy' give strong evidence of its unbounded methodology. Without disturbing the foundations of our ethos, Hinduism has always shown broad-mindedness and tolerance towards the progressive adaptations of the new eras and generic transitions. Maybe for this reason itself, the Indian heritage is reputed to be the most mature of the world.

In most of our households, we see traditions being followed, like the lighting of the "Diya", Putting "bindi" on the forehead, "fasting "etc. For several generations, we follow these customs, mostly coz our elders turned them into a legacy, but deep within them, they hold the very foundation of our society and the norms that have helped the society to sustain itself.

For many of my growing up years I have watched my parents following small rituals in our everyday lives and many a times have there been questions arising in my mind, and after a long time searching for answers I have come across some of them. These answers have opened up my eyes to the intricate structure that is the base of our very existence.
Happy Janmashtmi :)

finally finally .........

When organizing my never-ending to-do list, I prioritize and also consider how much time each task will take to complete.Saying "no" is the hardest part for me, especially when it is something that will only take an hour or so, BUT those hours quickly multiply when you have soooooo many people asking.
The time factor is a major problem which many of us forget to compute into the equation. That's how we end up saying we will do 38 hours worth of work in 24 hours and don't even think about eating and sleeping in the allotted time.....
hope numal and optimization helps me frame n solve my equations correctly ....
wow i FINALLY traced the utility of reading subjects like numal n ot ,( i have been searching for this answer since the beginning of my sem ):D :D
so wit this note me goin to go for analysis yes numerical analysis :)

decode !!

Why is it that some books appeal to you more than others even though each of them may be saying the same thing? Why do the same words, spoken by one person go straight to your heart whereas when they come from another, you react with indifference or even distaste?Why do you want instantaneous answers to some questions but can wait for some answer for ages without even wincing once ? What is that finally helps us, to distinguish the genuine from the artificial? What is that helps us decipher the final and correct answer when we are working on the final clue ? What enables us to discern the real from the false, a truth from a fabrication, especially when they lie a hairs breadth apart?
Somewhere deep inside us, there seems to be an inbuilt ability to distinguish what is alive from what is dead ,what is good from what is bad ,what is true from what is false. This is how I see it. “Good” and “bad” are opinions - but the ability to distinguish that which lives from that which is stagnant or dead, is a faculty which forms part of one’s survival kit. Unfortunately it is a faculty which we human beings have not bothered to develop to any great extent and we have a high processing time reason being wait state ,finally reflected in our execution time :P
k me not going into process operations .... don wanna sound technical :P
so bbye
neha

ki mera prem patra padhkar tum naraaz mat hota

k so read one letter today on sm1's blog thought of sharin it wid u ,
njoy !
A teenage college guy sent a love letter (in Q/A format) to his classmate.

My Dearest Tina,
Please answer the following questionnaire. For Options
(A) 10 marks,
(b) 5marks and
(c) 3 marks.

1.
Whenever you enter the class room, your sight always falls on me because:
(a) of love
(b) you couldn't control seeing me
(c) really... Am I doing it?
2.
Whenever professor cracks joke, you laugh and turn and look at me because:
(a) you always like to see me smiling
(b) you are testing whether I like jokes
(c) you are attracted by my smile
3.
When you were singing in the class, I entered and immediately you stopped singing because:
(a) you are so coy to sing before me
(b) my presence influenced you
(c) you feared that whether I'll like your song
4.
When you were showing your childhood photo, when I asked for it, you hide it because:
(a) you felt ashamed
(b) you felt uneasy
(c) you don't know
5.
During trekking, myself and my friend gave you hand for lifting you and you took only my friend's because:
(a) you enjoyed my disappointment
(b) you won't feel leaving my hand after grabbing
(c) you don't know
6.
You were waiting yesterday for bus and didn't get into your bus.
(a) you were waiting for me
(b) you were dreaming about me and didn't notice the bus
(c) that bus was crowded
7.
You introduced me to your parents when they came to college because:
(a) I am going to be your groom
(b) you just want to know what your parents think about me
(c) just you felt like introducing me to them
8.
I told that I like girls wearing roses. Next day, you came with a rose on your head because:
(a) to fulfill my wish
(b) you like roses
(c) by chance you got a rose
9.
On that day, it was my birthday. You too came to temple early at 6 :00 A.M because:
(a) you want to pray along with me
(b) you want to meet me before any one could meet on my birthday
(c) you want to wish me at temple because you are spiritual.

If you have scored more than 40, then you are loving me. Don't delay in expressing it.
If you have scored between 30 and 40 , love is budding in your heart and it's getting ready to bloom. If you have scored less than 30, you are in confusion whether to love me or not.
Eagerly awaiting your reply.
Love, Sameer

Here is the reply: Tina's reply letter was also in Q/A format.

Sameer,
Please answer the following Yes/No questionnaire.

1.
If somebody sits in the first row, normally people entering the class, sees them.
(a) Yes (b) No
2.
If a girl laughs and looks anyone, is it love?
(a) Yes (b) No
3.
While singing, if somebody forgets lines of the songs, will he/she stop singing or not?
(a) Yes (b) No
4.
I was showing to my friends (who are all girls) my childhood photo. You poked your nose inside. Right ?
(a) Yes (b) No
5.
I avoided to hold your hand during trekking. Couldn't you understand yet?
(a) Yes (b) No
6.
Should I not wait for my best friend (Anjali ) at the bus stand?
(a)Yes (b) No
7.
Shouldn't I introduce you to my parents as a friend?
(a) Yes (b) No
8.
You have said you also like Lotus, cauliflower, banana's flower. Is it true ?
(a) Yes (b) No
9.
Oh was that your birthday. That's why I could see you in temple. I come daily to Temple. Do you know ?
(a) Yes (b) No

If you have answered "Yes" to any of the question, then I am not loving you. If you have answered "No", then you don't know the meaning of Love. Hope everything is clear to you.

n tats so b'ful .......

Everyday you see him. He passes a smile at you and you pass one by. You dont know him. His torn clothes, his messy hair. The face covered in grime. But the smile, tat's so beautiful… more beautiful than the most beautiful rainbows that you’ve ever seen.

He cycles by everyday. Pedalling his way through the busy streets in the morning ..... His feet scarcely reach the pedals and as he stands and waits for the pedal to reach his foot, there is nohing more elegant anywhere in this world.He says something unintelligible as he passes you by… and smiles his usual charming smile.

Sometimes when you come back from class after writing your test, you are so tired. Too tired even to think. And when you close your eyes, you see him. Pedalling away on a cycle where his feet reach the pedals. He is dressed nicely in a clean starched cotton shirt and blue half pants, with his backpack and his water bottle, going to school. And you smile in your sleep.
Funny how somethings can make you so peaceful…

Funny how you can just feel warm on cold nights, by just thinking of some stranger somewhere in the world.

Funny how somethings can never be understood or even put to words .......
k me planning to sleep now :)
luv
neha

when u say nothing at all....

There are times when everything in one’s life is smooth with a sort of rhythmic feel to it. And one marvels at the blessing that it is, with joy in the heart and a spring in the step…every little thing gets in to place beautifully and is just as it should be and the canvas is colorful and vibrant. You are happy.

And then there are times when the complete opposite happens…where one is dragged down by the demons that there are, and it all seems like the "Universe has conspired against you" and even the things that are otherwise “right”, or at least alright… tend to go wrong..(k ,i know n so does those who have read my posts that these words often find place in my posts... i m seriously in luv wid this line of paulo coelho....)

Doesn’t anyone notice? Doesn’t someone, anyone care? Can’t they tell what you are going through?

Happiness-sorrow……good-bad….it all goes on. And you feel every bit of it. Inside, outside, everywhere. And try to live the good and bad as same…it’s a struggle…between you and nature. To see if you can hold your own or be swept away…So much happens in this tussle….nothing really happens…you feel you are going through battle and yet the world, your world, even the inner circle…seems to be unaffected by it…

And one does gives out signals. Everyone does…in their own ways. Some are heard, understood, some aren’t. And you keep wondering…can’t anyone see? Are they blind? Isn’t it ob? Doesn’t anyone care?

What were you thinking? After all, it is not like the earth would shatter because things are not going right for you. Or the sky would give out some signal to tell the world about your plight… Even if it feels like death to you, it doesn’t really matter… the world goes on. The world doesn’t care. In the larger scheme of things and lives, you mean NOTHING…

What an unsettling thought….here we give so much importance to ourselves…but nature has a way of reinforcing the most uncomfortable truths sooner or later…This whole concept of “I mean nothing” doesn’t sit very well with us in the scheme of self grandeur that we create for ourselves, does it? …and it gives us another reason for melancholy, another grudge against the universe…

It is a battle yes, but a personal one. One that has to be fought by oneself, for oneself. Because everyone is probably fighting their’s and no one really cares.

You might be unhappy, tired, hungry, rudderless or broken. But the world moves on. It is just the way it is.You have to keep yourself going ..may be for the world's sake ... It is business as usual......ok i know i crapped a lot here in this post but whatever ........

neha

ps: A 'blog' , merely an expression of thought and ideas from individuals ....but still it doesnt sound innocuous to some n blogspot is blocked again ... must say wowwwwwwww !!!! .....heck !

memoirs of a geisha!!!

Memoirs of Geisha--- The world of beauty. A true Geisha can stop a man in his track by a single look... They are the object of man's fantasies... Geishas' lives are being controlled, they have no choices, they did not become Geisha to pursue their own destinies...
A touching movie, watched it for the 3rd time...something is their abt this movie n i can watch it on n on .... the memoirs of a geisha ....geisha i really love the pronounciation of the word ..
Must say ,artists have a task and that task is to create. Artists draw from their own personal experience. Their senses take it in and your senses get aroused. Without artists there would be no culture. Everyone can relate in some way to at least one artists work, everyone. It can stir emotions long forgotten, take you to places you didn’t know existed or have never experienced. Art is the end result of a beginning....

kehna hi kya ye nain ek anjaan se jo mile !!!!!!!

kehna hi kya ye nain ek anjaan se jo mile ....vo unse -vo unse kabhi naa mile...ab kya karein ...kya naam lein ...kaise unhe voh pukare ..... He has seen her cycle to the college institute building everyday; she does not know of his existence. Lost in her own, solitary world, with an overflowing reality, there is no place for any gen person u see.
He has watched her day after day, month after month, for two years, harbouring no desire, no curiousity, nothing but a detached satisfaction in observing her, tracking her movements, deciphering every expression of her face.
And yet, despite the proximity that constant observation brings, she has not noticed him. Nor is he desperate that she should. For him, now, watching her, silently following her from a distance, these are the things that have turned from idle pastime to obsession.
He has seen her come to life in the morning mist; he has seen her joyous energy as she rushes past . He has seen her thoughts, her emotions written across her face. He has known her as no one else would; for her immediate acquaintances may have seen her success and failure, exaltation and disappointment, but he has seen her solitude.
He knows what time she would be on a particular road ; now he cycles, intersecting her path, that she may finally see him; she glances at him, nothing more than a part of her surroundings, and goes on. Entertained by her acknowledgement of his existence, he takes to this routine everyday. She comes to accept him as just another being, idling time away.
One day, suddenly, unexpectedly, his patience snaps; he decides to test her conversational abilities. He knows where she was going. He stops where she does and he stands in front of her saying "hi ,i wanted to talk to you sometime,can we "..... No shock on her face, nor fear neither curiosity...
"Who are you?"
But as he was about to proceed, she knows that she doesn’t need to know the answer. ... His eyes hold no tenderness, no weakness. Just a calm sense of possession, and faint amusement as she walks off her way (busy with her thoughts heading towards the class) leaving him unnoticed away as a mere part of surrounding as earlier.....

so neone having ne doubts abt the story .....about the justification .....can comment ........

why why why ?

Sometimes people like to act such that they are Samaritans, while actually their actions conflict with their words. Here your are, saying that the so called status ,the hep image .... is not as important as friendship, but there you are, voting that you deserve the status . And claiming that your thinkings are right, without looking at your own actions. Its when you know about everything ," everyone", and u still have the cheek to mark "everyone "down... Soooooo unfair...

Maybe people should always look at 2 sides of the coin, to find the reason WHY people don't agree with u... It's not the status or respect problem, its whether u deserve it a not...People should not boast and exaggerate to let everyone knows how much effort you had put in, should be modest enough...

By staying true to one self an idea becomes reality. By trying to please others, one can lose contact with whom they really are. This is not to say that pleasing people is bad. It is however dangerous if you are not being true to yourself. By sharing who you really are with others is genuine honesty
Is it really really difficult to be your true-self ????
or am i wrong that I don't follow the trend just to adapt to the new ambience in a new manner???
believe me its not difficult to b true n still adapting , jus give one shot to it and u'll feel the difference , may be I turn out to be wrong... may be right ....

I really hope the relationships do not continue to turn sour..... I don't wish things to turn out real bad and we begin to walk on different roads which will never meet ........

Just another day or....

For some it's just another day,for some yet another holiday,and for some the celebration day -the 60th independence day...for me the day started with the sms happy independence day ,went for the flag hoisting (after 2 long years, last i attended it in my school) by NSS....was really nice, thr was a very cute collarpin -flag distributed to all the lucky souls attending the ceremony,thr was a speech n there was singing of the patriotic songs reflecting the true Indian spirit ...these songs have nostalgia ,some kind of patriotic feel,a memory,i love them ...the songs were going in some sequence of regionalistic order and then came the royal Rajasthan's turn "DHARTI Dohrari "..i really love Rajasthani songs(be it dancing on their beats or singing :P) kind of gives u the majestic n royal feeling ....then in the end was the turn for the national anthem ... amazing feeling .....
finally nss went ahead with the noble cause of tree palantation on this special day...
ok so me not going to write yet another blogpost about the greatness of indian culture,our success n blah blah blah... (we all know about it).....keeping in mind the fact that
"Do we really love India & accept all its people the way they are? "or is it just a feel good blog that we write & forget about it at the very next instant?....
We have beautiful mountains may be what we lack is no sense of environmental protection...............
We have beautiful villages, may be most of them are suffering with poverty and illiteracy. ...........
We have beautiful beach cities and towns, may be the fishermen in those towns and cities are most effected person with lack of proper protections from cyclones. ..........
We have lot of people bestowed with the beauty of talent ,may be have lesser people to appreciate that beauty........
We have beautiful musicians, may be most of the Indians are indifferent towards the lives of the poor artists. .........
We give such high status to women incarnations the goddess Laxmi,Saraswati,may be today we have forgotten ...we all know the plight of Indian women in rural areas......
We are developing in IT industry and the growth is tremendous, may be the unemployment is on the increase and the hunger deaths are not uncommon.......
We are seeing the development of our country and we are also watching the terrorism on the raise...........
With all this good things and" draw backs"("No country is perfect,We have to try making it so!")

But for today let us first bask in the glory of the nation that we love dearly-India. India, the cradle of civilization and culture.

I love my India,Jai hind and Vande Matram are the words being uttered here there n everywhere
......So
"Vande Matram "
I am a proud Indian for ...
India is the BEST!
PS : ever wondered what independence really means ....independence we want from ....can we ever be independent i.e. not dependent on ne1

Kind of funny :P

When Indians speak English, it isn't usually the way the Americans do! So we all know about the Malayali who `zimbly' crossed the road n entered our `koledj ." . And, then, the snobbish Punjabi guy's story who told why and how he got his passport 'wallidated' and the 'waccination for malaria' - he went on ' wacation owersea' can't let go the trip without boasting :P And, yes, the Bengali who lost all data on his computer because he didn't `shave' them...

English, is a funny language. We can all "talk English, walk English, laugh English," as Big B (Amitabh Bhachan) said in some movie, but, let's face it, the English we speak is not always King's (or Queen's) English. English language, along with Hindi, is probably what bridges several diverse Indian communities as the most convenient means of communication among us. But English attains a comical effect when used by most of us who belong to different "regional ethnic" groups within the Indian community. Hampered by strong mother-tongue "interference," we struggle with alphabets that either twist our tongue or slip across it, thus screwing up the pronunciations some times.

We all know that certain communities are not quite comfortable with certain alphabets. Maharashtrians seem to have a problem with the alphabet F, while they also share an almost equal aversion to anything sounding `sh' with the Gujaratis ("the robber 'sot' him in the head). So there's this Mahrashtrian, Mr karnetkar say (or whatever other 'kar) who is totally `conphujed' while philling out his health club membership `pharm,'

Some have a fixation with a particular alphabet. Like the Malayali who likes to emphasize the `r' and complains about the poor `waterr' supply in his bathrroom . Poor guy, he doesn't get enough to bathe with his phavorite `Lex' soap. Also did I tell u that, he had high aspirations to go for 'Yum E' (ME) in literature! but destiny ....landed him here in Bits pilani with msc ...By the way, Y is a favorite alphabet, whose popularity cuts across all South Indian communities, especially since they aren't very fond of alphabets M and E. So don't be surprised if you encountered anybody from South India who's seen a strange movie called Yenter The Dragon :P

But when it comes to who's the boss, the Tamilian swears by his `bass,' while the Malayali sticks to his `bose.' The Tamilian, you see, loves the sound of a `ya' or `aa' at the end of a sentence. "Ready-aa?" he asks (he really is not trying to say Radia, believe me!). All he is asking is "Are you ready?" On the other hand, the Malayali may prefer to ask things in a negative tone - "It's very hot, no?" But the Gujarati from Ahmedabad loves to put an 'e' at the end of words, especially if there is an 'A' somewhere in the middle of that word. So he may shock you some times when you call him around 12 jus happened to be his wingies bday and ask him what he is upto and he says, "I am raping the gifts." And then forgot to tell ya abt this Gujarati woman telling my mum, "Maro dikro states ma udi gayo." It took mum a while to realise that her son has not flown to the US, but has simply failed his stats (or statistics) test at school...

And, please, don't get mad at me. My objective of "littering" around so many examples about the usage of English by different Indian regional ethnic groups is not to make fun of them. It is just to show how Ingliss, while an integral part of our daily life , has been moulded ('mauled' might be more appropriate) to suit cultural convenience and basic communication requirements of our diverse population. How we all - whether Rajasthanis, Biharis, Kanadas or Goans or whatever - talk in the Queen's language is often a source of entertainment.


Well, told u before no offences meant. Now, go on, Gujju aunty order a 'pijja' from Pijja Hutt and take a bite of your 'pijja' while telling your son not to listen to the `pope' music at all times.
Me goin 4 dAAta structures wid pope mujjik too
tatas

fruits cute fruits , my passion :D

Sweet taste of my childhood, bottled up, in peaches,grapes,mangoes and vanilla. Smooth n soft. Childhood, my land of enchantment, life, my ever lasting childhood. To write is to step onto a magic carpet and fly off into endless trips of nostalgia. Despair tastes sweet, like peaches, mangoes , white grapes, and the smell of vanilla. Personalities contained in bottles of scent, fragrances defying analysis. I am passionate about the sense of smell, taste, touch. Vision—the looking at the surface, it eludes me, it leaves me utterly befooled. Nothing is to be trusted except the most banal sentimentalism. I form my conclusions only through pure, heart wrenching emotion. And that’s where it all begins.
Magic carpet ride,
Transcended in the folds of time,
Ever on a mobile pedestal
Watching while I’m being watched
Cornered, yet above, beyond…
Feeling myself flying,
Masses of humanity, interlinked, unlinked,

Abstraction, it’s useless. But the last solace for many people. Thinking about why we meet who we meet, the pattern behind every coincidence that forms my life. If there was one, it may have seemed amazingly b'ful or Heart wrenchingly elusive. Stories that defy a normal ending.

Mango, orange, apricot. Almond..... Smells wafting through my brain, associated with different names. ..... Apricot… water melon….. the smell salty sweet, fruity flower, flowery fruit-


Trying to escape mush, but that’s how it is- you are my all, though I’d never say it. Not to you. Bicycle rides, picnics in the sun, sitting in lawns, tall trees making shades in the corner. Sparrow nests, plant life, the rays of the sun. Unsuspecting sun, like orange juice, fortified with vitamin C, blindingly orange. I love to drink the sun. The moon is milky white, banana milkshakes that are more white than pale creamy yellow. A stream of elixir. A trail of star dust. Eating water melon in pieces, consuming rain water. Monsoon rain aahhh !!!(sigh). Eating rain in the dry humid summer :D.


To be forever on an abstract cloud of sensation. Cheers!!!!

Those memories… sometimes like gentle rain. At other times like a storm… lightning tracing my veins. Sea shores and oceans engulfing us all some day. .......

A thousand kisses fly through the ethers to land on the specified target.
PS : had a "fruits n nuts "dairy milk before these thoughts circled around me ,lovely naa so the credit of me writin these post goes to saurabh who actually gifted me the Dairy milk :)

nesh 4 u :)

mission impossible....

Was jus bloghopping today read a few posts one being this n was wondering ,everyone, at some point of his or her life, has dreamed of being somebody special, somebody big. Who hasn't fantasized about being the one who hits the game-winning homer? Who hasn't dreamed of being the homecoming queen? And how many times have we dreamed of being rich, or successful, or happy with our relationships?

Often, we dream big dreams and have great aspirations. Unfortunately, our dreams remain just that – dreams. And our aspirations easily collect dust in our attic.
This is a sad turn of events in our life. Instead of experiencing exciting adventures in self actualization, we get caught up in the humdrum of living from day-to-day just barely existing.We often end up saying "soundz like impossible "

But you know what? Life could be so much better, if only we learned to aim higher.
The most common problem to setting goals is the word impossible. Most people get hung up thinking I can't do this. It's too hard. It's too impossible. No one can do this.

However, if everyone thought that, there would be no inventions, no innovations, and no breakthroughs in human accomplishment.
Remember that scientists were baffled when they took a look at the humble bumblebee. Theoretically, they said, it was impossible for the bumblebee to fly. Unfortunately for the bumble, bee no one has told it so. So fly it does.

On the other hand, some people suffer from dreaming totally outrageous dreams and not acting on them. The result? Broken dreams, and tattered aspirations.

If you limit yourself with self-doubt, and self-limiting assumptions, you will never be able to break past what you deem impossible. If you reach too far out into the sky without working towards your goal, you will find yourself clinging on to the impossible dream.

Try this exercise(it really works ). Take a piece of paper and write down some goals in your life. Under one header, list down things ‘you know you can do’. Under another header, write the things ‘you might be able to do.’ And under one more, list the things that that are ‘impossible for you to do.’

Now look at all the headers strive every day to accomplish the goals that are under things ‘you know you can do’. Check them when you are able to accomplish them. As you slowly are able to check all of your goals under that heading, try accomplishing the goals under the other header-the one that reads ‘you might be able to do.’

As of the items you wrote under things I could do are accomplished, you can move the goals that are under things that are ‘impossible for you to do’ to the list of things ‘you might be able to do.’

As you iterate through this process, you will find out that the goals you thought were impossible become easier to accomplish. And the "impossible" begin to seem possible after all.

You see, the technique here is not to limit your imagination. It is to aim high, and start working towards that goal little by little. However, it also is unwise to set a goal that is truly unrealistic.

Those who just dream towards a goal without working hard end up disappointed and disillusioned.

On the other hand, if you told someone a hundred years ago that it was possible for man to be on the moon, they would laugh at you. If you had told them that you could send mail from here to the other side of the world in a few seconds, they would say you were out of your mind. But, through sheer desire and perseverance, these impossible dreams are now realities.

Thomas Edison once said that genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration. Nothing could be truer. For one to accomplish his or her dreams, there has to be had work and discipline. But take note that that 1% has to be a think-big dream, and not some easily accomplished one.

There can be no gains unless you are put out of your comfort zone. Remember the saying, “No pain, no gain”? That is as true as it can be.

So dream on, ! Don’t get caught up with your perceived limitations. Think big and work hard to attain those dreams. As you step up the ladder of progress, you will just about find out that the impossible has just become a little bit more possible.
ok me sounding too much like a moral science teacher
time to say bbye :)
love
neha

me a big gurl :P

recently had a conversation wid one of my frns ,made me feel like me a big big gurl :P
here it goes.....
Ankur : There is no pride in losing…
me : You mean you’d rather not participate than lose?
Ankur: Yes. Because when you lose, you lose your pride in front of millions.
me: And when you don’t play for the fear of losing, you don’t lose anything?
Ankur: Yep.
me: Hahaha !!Let me get this straight. Your statement tells me two things. First you are telling me that losing in front of millions of people humiliates you, but losing in private does not. And second, not participating for the fear of losing or let me say failure does not upset you… and would not mean that you have no pride whatsoever?
Ankur: No ,You’re getting me wrong. I meant to say that I’d rather not take a challenge that I’m not confident of pulling off.
me: Which means you’d never take on a risk?
Ankur: That would be correct.
me: Have you seen snow?
Ankur: No. Not really.
me: And you’ve never been to Ottawa rite ?
Ankur: No ,btw ur ottawa proff seems to b in ur mind all times :P
me: jokes apart abhi ,would you like to btw ?
Ankur: Sure.
me: But what if you catch a cold…? Isn’t that a risk? Or it is not too much of a risk?
Ankur: I er…
me: Ok. Forget that. Tell me, would you go to a lady at a bar and ask if you could have a dance…?
Ankur: Sure. If she is pretty :P
me: Hahaha. Okies , Suppose you do that. And then she, in somewhat a loud voice, refuses. Would you never ask another lady to dance - until you were absolutely sure that she was taken in by you?
Ankur: Umm…
me: Do you ever use a public toilet? Or shake hands with strangers?
Ankur: Yes…
me: Thats a risk. Do you know that there are 1600 types of bacteria in a public toilet and that 80 percent of the people don’t wash their hands after they’ve been to the toilet?
Ankur: Ah well, thats a risk I can take.
me: Hmm… do you know that you could catch diseases like ebola from shaking hands with some one who’s not washed hands after going to the toilet. Ebola is fatal… You can get hookworms, pappilomaviruses and hepatitis A from toilet seats. There are other diseases but
I am not even going to talk about it… How do you feel about the challange now?
Ankur: Er… here it is doctor speaking ,me not from medical family remember !!btw I never knew all this.
me: I rest my case. And hey come on! Give yourself a break. Sometimes do things just for the heck of it. Most of the times when you’re worrying about public failures, people are not even regarding you with any remotest interest…!
Ankur: Alright. You win… but really? Hepatitis A?
me: Hehe… Naah I was just kidding with you :P. Wanted to see how long you would defend yourself :D
Ankur :uuuuuuuuuu
me: yeah yeah me the witty , me the smartest :P
Ankur: add to it a real good counsellor
me:Haan did i mention about my fees
Ankur: Mam do i qualify to get some concession ,remember i am one of ur gud frns
me: oh yeah yeah faintly
Ankur:so how much do i owe you
me:nothin much jus a bada waala dairymilk wud do
Ankur: :D done
....................................................
.......................................................
......................................................
and the conversation contd

ps : thought of sharin an interestin conversation in the end my frn recently had on ip messenger (kinda im for lan u can say wid loads of ppl on ur list )
ar : hey
karthika : (wondering ar who ) hey ,btw who's it
ar : oh this is amitabh bacchan n u ?
karthika :( thinkin of writin mein mein madhuri dixit but soundz ..)ok this is aishwarya rai
ar: oh matlab meri bahuraani ,kaisi ho ?
:DDDDDDDDDD
cutting the crap here



- Neha

confessions about self from my shelf :P

I was going through my “stuff” yesterday was actually searching for the greeting cards ,thought of adding to the decorations of my room …and I came across my very old daily planner( i usually preserve my stuff the old greetings ,my gifts ,the photoalbums,the posters ,the dry leaves )…it was the ‘Winnie the Pooh’ one…and in it…I still had those old…very old…short little ‘thoughts’ I wrote when I was……must be when I was 13 or 14…I can’t remember now…honestly…and if you would have seen... ink has become a faint colour…so I don’t know how long I have been saving these pieces for…I can’t believe I was such a loser then…my writing sucked big time…but anyhow…this is what I wrote when I was probably high or something back then :P…
here goes the piece of writing by lil neha :D

I stared intently at the bright night sky.
Stars dangling in the smooth dark sky, embracing the moonlight as it showered on them.
I believed that when i am fast asleep, the stars come down from the sky and enter into my life.
Behind every star theres a story.
It may have a good story or it may have a bad one.
But the one entered into my life…Not just entered my life, but entered directly into my heart …my mind and my soul.
I fought furiously as it took over my soul…
But I couldn’t swim the raging waves but slowly and deeply…I began to sink…
I sank deeper and deeper…until I couldn’t see the dark sky…slowly darkness enwrapped me…feeling numb and insecure…
I gathered up my faith and my hope…
I began to swim…I swam faster and faster…until I reached the path where I had lost control…
I trudged on that path…helpless…and cold…knowing I had no where else to go…
I closed my eyes and whispered my prayers…
I had to get to the end of this path…but it will take me forever…to reach the end.
I fell down almost giving up…until the moonlight showered on me…
I embraced it…and stood on my feet…
I walked and walked and the path seemed endless…
I won’t give up now…as I stared intently at the bright night sky…stars dangling in the smooth dark sky, embracing the moonlight as it showered on them.

I don’t know what I was thinking then…and why I wrote such a crappy piece…hahaha....guess I have been a little messed up…have a good one…ahh.

Distances........

Why can't we get all the people together in the world that we really like and then just stay together? I guess that wouldn't work. Someone would leave. Someone always leaves. Then we would have to say goodbye. I really really hate goodbyes :(
I tend to keep people at a distance and only let a select few get close. Even those few far away, for now we only see each other a very few times. Distance is always there( be it 100 steps or 1000 steps ... i always view distance in terms of steps u know ). I suppose it is comfortable. No one overly close. Not a strong possibility of disappointment or pain. It scares me sometimes.

Have you ever been in a crowd of 20 people you adore.. or received lots of phone calls in one day.. and still feel lonely? i did ....
Worst still, have you ever come close to getting whom/what you loved, and pushed it away?
Does it make sense that you would push something away that you quietly yearn for? And yet, you seem to have no control over it.. as though the self-defense mechanisms are operating on their own.. and you have absolutely no say in the matter..........


PS: friendship day ...so many msgs ,and lots of long fone calls after long tym :P n max no of buzzes on gtalk
get togethers but thr was an emptiness i went through......

here it is for all my frns ....

Don't point your mouse here
or here or
here and definately not HERE





Aah well jus got a SMS :P
If I could, I'd comb the sky and collect the stars,
Quickly pile them into a basket until it overflowed with silvery light.
And then I'd give the basket to you, because all things precious and beautiful
should belong to you.
cho chweet naaa

It's the Friendship day... so many years passed by and when i look back, i realize how i used to see new faces around and how soon they used to turn old n familiar , fortunately by the blessings of Almighty, I still see the old faces around Faithful and strong, Making me wealthier than Kuber, the lord of riches... and prouder than Abraham. I could write and write about what I am feeling, and I could make poems on these precious souls that surround me, In fact I am really blessed to have very loyal and good friends with whom I can share my thoughts, my views....with whom I can fight ,argue……I can vent out my emotion and listen to their rant…..with whom I can roam around freely and safely without hurting my personality, character, future and my dreams.
I could thank them for the support and help they have given when I needed them the most,
I could thank them for accepting me the way I am, with all my imperfections,
I could thank them for beleiving in me, even when in their hearts they knew i was wrong,
I could thank them for smiles they filled in my life,
I could thank them for all the tears they brushed off
But how could i ever thank them for Making my world so special, so wanted and so precious???
wishing all the angels without wings,who make my world special just by being in it

HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY..

SMS -Sweet messages sent ....

The train of thought begins with an sms received, it went something like " Khuda se thoda rehem khareed lete... aapke zakhmon ka marham khareed lete.. agar kahin bikti khushiyan meri.. to saari bechkar appka har gam khareed lete.." I start wondering.. if a person really meant that? i mean do u really mean what u send across.. esp these kinda forwards.. emails or sms or mms?? yeah admitted that sending sms means that u are thought about and blah blah.. and that while those figners are going too fast on the phonebook list ur name flashes for a split second decision. on whether to be clicked or not .. ye.. this does mean that u are remembered.. somewhere, by someone.. while u were sleeping like a baby.. unaware, blissful..

Most times i am happy to receive these messages, esp when i know that they have been sent by ppl i know genuinely care, just sometimes i start to wonder if they really knew what they were sending. usually i am a very bad forwarder.. unless of course something really humourous comes along and i want to share wid my friends and family, but most times i use sms on phones or emails just to communicate, even if its just a hi.. howz u, or just checking on u ... i think that makes more sense .. dosent it? what wid all this technology coming up, which say it better wid a picture stuff.. techie as i am , i dont relate well to those.. my pretty simple mobile has yet many features that i still have to discover..

Just a few days back.. i discovered that my mobile can actually compose tunes.. now why would one want to do that is somthing uncomprehendable for my little brain, but well it does.. so now i go like all excited and happy and show it to one of my better knowledgable frns.. hey... my mobile can make music, and in return get stared and checked out if i have grown a tail .. not as in the devil .. but as in our ancestors.. yeah well so rah rah for the dumb me!!! Somehow reminds me of a sentence in my favorite essay.. "Those were the days when the hurries and worries of this materialistic world were foreign to me" .... I would like to rephrase that to " These are the days when the technology and paraphernalia are foreign to me " But i aint ashamed of my shortcomings. And why should i worry about gadgets anyways.. I have this cute sweet friend of mine.. swaps.(we keep talkin of swapping life's :P) as i call him, now hes what one would term as " technology guy "(n me "technology ignorant" obviously :P )anything there is to about gadgets, he's gotta know about it, so i get all my gadget advices from him, and most times i just blindly follow his advices... he's one bright gadget himself :) smart as ever .. but if i start rambling about that.. i will probably end up writing a book.. so heres an abrupt end to this post while i find some excuses to give for being late for a meeting ...
luv
neha

turn back time n back to future :P!!!

This week has been pretty eventful. Had some of the greatest moments :)The most exciting news of the week, is the beautiful weather erratic rains :P that we are now having . I just hope it stays around this time :)
hmm life gets so bizeee in holidays, though i still managed to steal a few moments for me :P.....It’s exciting to just sit back and think about the past years of clg life ,kinda fun going back after all these years, with a new perspective and reason for learning.
My second yr was a good one. Learned many new things, from study habits, to knowledge in general,met a lot of new people and made some great friends. I’ve also took part in some memorable events. marudhara dance , the apogee projet , the CSA farewell eve's comparing :P .... these events classify to b amongst the inomparable n unforgettable events . In general, my first two years were a great experience!

Now D-Day is coming and my new semester will commence on 1st of August. I will be back to college this Monday ,will have the change from having nothing to do to tonnes of things to do. Thinking of the first day already made me feel kinda odd. The first day will mean getting together wid all the frns yippie ,lots of cleaning to my room :P, the dairymilk treats (i have to take from so many :D), inputting this gadget I'm using to type this now into my college life!

Donno howz the new sem gonna b ,have lots of hopes n aspirations as always . hard to take or lite ? ....I can't answer you whether I can take it or not yet until I get my hands on the textbooks and class:P Any words of motivation or anonymous criticisms?

And that brings me to the end of this blog because I need to get some sleep ..
nesh 4 u :)

Once again....

As a dear friend likes to say - My blog is sleeping. Yes,once again : ), this time blogspot is not blocked but still.....

I'm on vacation and have been spending some real quality time with my family in Jaipur( my idea of perfect city). It's been just great. Fun wid my dear dearer and dearest bro, my cousins thr in the town too (had been njoyin pillow fights after long long time )n telling dad and mom the goa stories in the evenings (though they had it all over cellfone and the pics told them a lot but tat doesnt give a feel neither to me nor to them :D ). Playing with my lil' niece keeps me busy all day .With her around, time just flies.And not to be forgotten are the S3's( sweet scolding sessions :P) i keep getting on not eating this -that from loveliest doctors around (how can one not like doctors... and imagine my plight when I get to hear this ) , love them cho much :)

I am trying to keep myself away from the virtual world as much as possible since I know once i'm back in Pilani I will be spending most(almost all) of my time away from real people... So I'm off, getting ready to head to some more fun with my family :)

Did I forget to mention how much I'm enjoying mom's food and roaming around in the city with friends... hehe

so here I am signing off
PS :wishes of my frns to keep the post small done i guess ;)
hope to ciao soon :D

bye bye bye !

As I lay down on my cot for the last time, thoughts of missing this place went through my head, missing the people and the funk life we had made in a kind of unknown environment:P
Good bye's can be difficult and heart wrenching. Sometimes they are even enlightening, a NEW beginning ( learnt a few hrs ago abt this fund from amongst the one i had to bid bye ); letting go of the old to welcome the new. It is the most difficult aspect of moving on. And i knew it will be too difficult for me to say goodbye goa and , so here i am ,writing to say goodbye to goa and my frnds too (will b meeting them in 10 ays but still ):|
yesterday as I looked around the circle we were sitting (certificate recieving ceremony in my workplace ) into the eyes of each one of them ( all my ps mates together for the last -last time ), I recalled special and unique things about each one, so I might burn in my memory their image. I knew we would meet again under different circumstances, for many of them are destined to ........
getting early in the morning and again seeing two of my friends departing , one with whom i used to share every happening of my PS starting from the morning walk to the evening walk ,
The other one always added so much fun to all the lacha sessions we had , the trips we all enjoyed those gen dinners at ginza (donno when it became our group's fav joint ), the beaches , the bus journeys , those night walks on highway ,the lacha sessions , and of course of all, all our weekend trips naa naa PLANNED weekend trips .....
I missed saying goodbye to a few probably (the beaches , the lush greenery , the highway,gsl ,the goa campus and some ppl too i guess :P)..was difficult for me and i decided not to .........

Was just thinking that "Why do we find that people leave our lives for seemingly no reason at all? "As we follow our self-enquiry, as we look inside and learn about ourselves we begin to vibrate at a different density. It is our initial vibration that attracted people into our lives in the first place. It is like we cannot touch those who do not move in the same direction as us. The emotions you have are a positive reflection of the relationships you have developed with the people you've managed. I realize it won’t be the same once you are gone, but unless you are moving far away, you will be able to stay in touch with some, if you chose to do so. Others will simply slip away and the best thing we can do is to let them. For when one person slips off our screen another can enter and we can draw towards us new people who do resonate with us and who do bring a new energy into our lives. It is these people that we now attract and it is these that we can now not only receive from but give to. With them we will grow, open new doors and explore new heights.
I would say bye-bye to all those to whom I didn't and say keep in touch that's it ...
rest is destiny ........

A trip to paradise !!!!

"Images are the killers of the reality" I can't recall this or this type of words where I read but if you are visiting Dudhsaagar falls in Goa with some of the images I assure you that you are going to find the vice versa situation , here reality is all prepared to kill your images. Seen a few pics of dudhsaagar ones found them quite alluring but never did i expected to land up on paradise .....yups if thr is a real paradise itz nowhere but here n here n here n here .................

Waterfalls , especially at this time of year is certain to charm and enthrall . . but if not careful, if not prepared, if acting with undue hubris, a visit to the dudhsaagar can also end up debilitating,.... the force of the aeration in the plunge pool is plenty to suck a person under. Please be mindful of your surroundings folks, and don't go swimming ..........this was all one of my goa frns told me about these falls


So with the pics and the words in my mind ,a deciding moment came and pics superceeded so we were all finally set for the adventure of chasing the clouds , playin wid the gusting wind and getting drenched in the sensuous waters of dudhsaasar .Got up at 5:15 am ,the first time so early in goa and took a train from vasco to castle rock to rock !!!!!.It was really spending some quality time with my friends in train - singing songs :D,cracking jokes etc etc.

After an hour or so begins the real fun,throughout your journey ,you will feel mesmerised by the adventurous and scenic beauty of heights and what should i call i guess valleys .......surrounded by thick forests and countless number of small- small streams running down the mountains.The trouble of broken sleep in the early morning was forgotten and I felt blissfully happy to enjoy the cloud play during this time along with the occasional hide and seeks game of mist .....
It served as a picturesque place by the railway tracks. Must say it's really like a paradise to nature lovers like me who love seeking solitude and enjoying the beauty of the nature. Next was the turn to witness the spellbounding dudhsaagra falls from the train ,the only means to get to these falls calling you aloud was to jump off the train (it was pretty slow too)but but -but we didnt and consoled our souls saying it would have been equally same , whether u stare at the falls for a few secs or few mins.But sometimes universe conspires to do things in your favour and we were fortunate enough to get another train from castle rock which used to stop at dudhsaagar .yippie !!!!!


We boarded this train and were all set for dudhsaagar our destination to paradise
We had to walk a few kms along the track ,cross some tunnels from the station to reach dudhsaagar. Besides the track were streams ,time to take a dip in the clear and cold waters :). You will also see water gushing down like a shower from openings in the tunnels, which serve as a refreshing shower if you are tired of the walk.I really was. Everything you see is wet, wet and wet. Its usually pouring day and night and you have to be either very well prepared or be ready to get completely wet. We had both: we were well prepared and yet we were ready to get completely wet and enjoy the rains, and of course we chose the second option.
Looking out at an opening, soaring features frame the backdrop with prominent peaks . You wonder, where am I? yes the dudhsaaagar falls The view from of the falls was breathtaking. The falls looked amazing ......
passing over, up, around, and through several significant ravine / waterfall drainages, and attaining magnificent views from scary prominences,soon i was at the spraying plunge pool of Dudhsaagar Falls - a perspective not many get due to the semi-technical nature of the short but risky scramble.We had a real funk time spashing water over each other and making sure that each one of us gets fully
drenched .......
When you’re returning on your left are magnificient mountains, deep in a forested canyon, euphonious bird song and rippling water livening the pulse of the day, and sun beating down while the rest of the area is drenched in kind of mist, with nothing on your agenda but this! -- you know you’re somewhere different and special.You think - how perfectly lovely! You want to roll out sheet and open up the picnic basket and just lay there contemplating sweet divine nothingness in mindless bliss.
Time to say bye to the falls , while returning back to walk on the tracks we saw monkeys (some quite small, one seemed to be about the size of a fist) it reminded me of you ,really :PPPPP.


This is the time when your body begins to complain lightly, lead by the legs that are beginning to feel overworked. Add trouble with your back if you are carrying a bag which some of us were carrying ....Now we had to take a lift from someone guess!!
a goods train ,i know difficult for you naa but yeps u gotto ask for the lift from train and after plenty of requests we got it !!!!!!we were to stand on the open side an experience of lifetime must say.
colorful, dense, textured rocks ajumbled in the sensuous stream bed; the flawless forest of venerable, gnarly blue and coconut along with certain other trees gleaming like cyclopean creatures opening up to the sun. We passed through one of the most beautiful routes .


This was the journey till Colem from where u take the bus or train to vasco ....
You carry the pain and tiredness even after you get into your bus, and reach the city. The pain vanishes in a few days, but the memory will stay forever
Dudhsaagar trip really-really offers bountiful promise of unbridled adventure .

Irritatin jobs !!!!

Its frustrating actually VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV frustrating to try to understand code written by others. I know this the best , had to struggle a lot in past few days wid it, was bizee redesigning .And believe me designing is much much easier than to redesign .Everyline u proceed with , and the smallest thing say something with the braces and you can see hundreds of errors popping up .Oh i used to be so scared (after editting ) of having a look at screen as i pressed run .....100's of errors
however , soon my immunity power satarted increasing :D .whatever editting is heck .
More so when people don't care about proper indentation and commenting. Can't really do anything about unwritten comments, but I can give you two tips to indent the code written by someone else in C my field till yet ,can't tell ya much about web designing scripting myself struggling it wid it yet but gen :


Learn to use the command 'indent' (*nix only) if its a C code. Do 'man indent' and find out the options that fit the best to your taste. They have some excellent examples in the man page.
If the code is in some other language, try this method. Open up the file in vi (or gvim). Press 'gg' (to go to the beginning of the file), then press 'v' (for visual) and then press 'Shift-g' (or 'G', to go to the end of the file). This will select everything in the file. Now comes the magic :) ... while everything is selected, press '=' and - voila! - your code is properly indented :). Of course, instead of selecting the whole document, you can select parts of it using some combination of 'v' and other keys and indent only that part.

And yes, you can be lazy too, and not indent while writing the code.. since you can always indent it later using these methods, but I wouldn't recommend it. That would be sacrilege.

Why am I me ???

is life just nohting than
play till the age of 5,
serious -studies till 18 :P ,
love at teenage,
job at 22's,
marriage at 25's,
struggle for money and fame(more and more) till 60's,
bother abt our kids till 80's
then death .....
then again the same cycle of birth and death...?

At this age probably philosophy starts to haunt you alot. Yeah had a conversation wid a bunch of my frns of recent , everybody nveloped by same sphere of questions.I wonder how Sophie (of Sophie's World) could handle so many questions at such a premature age!

So, what are the questions all of us are looking to ask and answer? In particular, what are your own questions? Many times we dont have questions but instead tasks that we want to finish, but dont know how to........ so what are those tasks? What are the things you think about alot?


My list for now is rather short:

1. Who and what am I? Why do I want to know this? and how can I?

2. What to do after I know myself? Change myself for better? Or not?

3. Are there any fundamental principles to live by?

I should (and probably would) spend one post on each of these questions and explain what I mean by them. Then probably you can help me from your experiences.

This, by the way, reminds me of another mini question:
Should I experience everything myself or learn from my peers' and my seniors' experiences to my benefit?
Ahh how I love my curious mind! :P
experiences ummmmmmmm
Inexperience is the mamma of creativity. If you do not have experience you try out stuff differently from whats tried, tested, and rejected.
It's this innocence of ignorance that spins new formulae from old hats.Someone i recently had discussion wid told me

"Re-examine all you have been told.
Discard what insults your soul"

I guess everyone learns different things out of an experience, so it's important to KNOW what it means to you...It may not satisfy u always either, so do keep probin- g further, and if necessary, plunge urself...

Just an opinion though:)
PS: Tell me about your 'questions' in the comments for now and any possible answers for the mini-questions

puzzled nesh 4 u :O

A smile an everlasting smile ???????????

something special about these pics .....ummm may be simplicity
may be the smiles
may be the innocence
may be the thoughts of everyday life for a few
may be the plight of people
what comes to ur mind when ya go throgh these pics ?





pics from zari near bits pilani goa campus , the street i had to cross everyday ...
Special thanx to the person who captured the pics for me n had my wishes done :)
njoy
nesh 4 u

DND .....dare not disturb!

away , not @ my desk , do not disturb n for me dare not disturb ............
seems to b one of the most common IM status messages ......
Attention is our most valuable commodity, what we are attending to at the moment is what gets done. There are all manner and means of distracting me from what I am doing in the hopes of getting me to do what you need or want me to do.Interruptions ,they do leave you frustrated when you dont want to be disturbed .. your status message clearly reads" away" or " please do not disturb"
I donno y ppl jus dont seem to understand this statement , i always thought "dont disturb " to be 2 simple english words meaning " keep off " but i guess something wrong wid the notion i carry till date .....whenever i have the status message sayin do not disturb n mind it i have this status message when i really m bizee or disturbed
i think ppl read it as please do do disturb , everybody will buzzz , some messages go like this
.......k so m i Disturbin u too :P
.......disturbed u hehe
........sorry to disturb u
........ohho dnd busy wid what
........talkin to whom ;)
........i dare disturb
(what fun is it disturbin a person when his or her status message reads dnd... i never get , i mean if some1 dont want to get disturbed cant he be left undisturbed , if u have smthyn which can b put on a hold jus mail him/her y disturb when her/his msg readz clearly dnd )

........ mr xyz :hey plz respond its very imp
me :yeah say
mr xyz : btw am i disturbing
me :no not much , say
mr xyz :whenever u r busy u shud not sign in gtalk.......:P
i jus wanted to say this , continue wrkin :) or if u want u can talk i don't mind ;)
me : bye n thnx 4 the advise
also thr r messages like

:hey listen the presentation is postponed
or plz dont forget to bring my buk kinds...........
or plz take this file and transfer me later ..
or can u gimme miss ...'s no its really urgent



Now as per mr xyz ...yeah rite but at tyms u have to b on an IM for u r discussin smthyn imp wid sm1 or mebbe need to give a regular feedback abt the progress of wrk ........ well its not about whether the user is physically capable of communication, but rather whether they are willing to interrupt their current work flow to participate. Combined with physical presence, a measure of a user’s willingness to be interrupted indicates their availability
So, while the cost equation may be in question, the trend is unmistakable: there will be more means of interruption in the future, not fewer.


One interruption may be senseless, while the next conveys critical information. Who is capable of making the determination?

Well, the recipient should definately be able to determine whether the interruption was worthwhile or not. Unfortunately it is too late once the message has been received. The presence model is supposed to portray enough information for the sender to make a deterimination regarding the urgency of their message content. Herein we find another problem.

Senders, determining whether or not to interrupt, are inherently selfish. Their need to convey or obtain information to/from the recipient often overwhelms the recipients perception of their own availability.

How have users like you n me to overcome these interruptions? Well, I would contend that we usurpt the presence system and introduce a level of “plausible deniability”. We either leave the system set to “online” continuously, change our status to “away” while we are busy to remove any expectation of a reply, as when we use “do not disturb” it maintains some level of ambiguity. Does this cheating of the system undermine the trust?

Ultimately, though, the interruptions which come in the form of IMs can easily be prioritized by the recipient and responded to in an appropriate manner. Your presence should have enough hints in it to cue the people who want might want to interrupt. you can always gp aboutt BLOCKING ppl the last resort .....
My concern is when the presence systems begin to infiltrate other technologies and interruptions begin to occur on a more physical level (such as a telephone call or drop-in visitor to the room ). What will we do then?
ne answers ????????????????????????????????????????????????